I care more than I care to admit

AND it's raining.  Life is rough.

Would this be a good time to ask for followers?  @ShearerThanYou

YouTube History

Ladies and Gentlemen, I just became the first person in YouTube history to NOT click "Skip Ad".

Watched the whole ad.

And I actually lol'd.

Here's the ad in question (NSFW):

By the way, I hope there wasn't an ad before this ad.  If there was, I'm sorry, and hope it was worth your time.  Here's some pizza-porn to make up for it:

This is why I love dating an English Teacher

Spell-check and Autocorrect have made it way too easy for us to get away with butchering the English language on a daily basis.

This is from a 16-year-old High School Student's English essay, currently being graded by my girlfriend, her teacher.  The essay is about school dress-codes...

I think it's safe to say that "sleeveless shits" are against ALL school dress-codes.

Reminds me of this...

Coming this February: Pancakes

And yes, you are correct... that would be the "Lo-Fi" filter on Instagram.

Notoriously B.I.G. prices in FloRida

Can you even handle this much pun?

Wicked lame.

Hot 96.9's Facebook page just shared this video, a promo for A&E's newest reality show, "Southie Rules".

And I'm a little concerned.

It's not that I worry for how Boston will be portrayed to the rest of the country... We've already strayed too far from having a salvageable national reputation.

Nor am I concerned about their use of the word "wicked".  As a lifelong resident of the Boston area, I can confirm that they are indeed using it in the proper context.

It's more personal than that.  Arguably selfish.  I'm worried that when I continue to use the word "wicked" in my everyday life (as I have since childhood), I'll look like a total douchebag.

See-- If I were to go to New York City today, and ask a random stranger, "Excuse me, Broadway Street is wicked long, how do I find where the hit musical 'Wicked' is playing?", they would probably respond with "OH COOL!  You said 'wicked!'  You must be from Boston!"  Of course, I'd then tip my scally-cap and start a "Yankees Suck" chant through my Sam Adams-soaked beard before confirming, "Why yes, I am!"

NOT ANYMORE.

After the show premiers tonight on A&E, the conversation will go more like this...

"Excuse me, Broadway Street is wicked long--"
"UGHH you watch that awful show?  I'm judging you so hard right now.  You probably also think Pauly D is a legitimate DJ."

For the record, I don't.

Greatest Photobomb of All Time?

At first I thought the term "photobombing" needed explaining, but this picture sums it up pretty well:

The reason I bring up photobombing is because I think this kid may have perfected it.  This picture has been floating around for a while, but it's resurfaced this morning, and for good reason:

This kid deserves recognition for winning the internet.

And while we're at it, I might as well share a photobomb of my own from a party two summers ago:

To this day, I still don't know how I got my face to look like that Muppet...

That's the Motto

You know this song, right?

Well, I got this shirt as a gift...

In conclusion, awesome.

Speaking of Fire

That last post reminded me of this picture I took about 6 years ago on Tremont Street downtown...

Careful where you throw those cancer-stix... er... car-fire stix.  I suppose this could have been a careful move if the car-owner needed a bit of insurance cash.  Does it work that way?  Whatever.  Don't burn your car.

Indoor pool, anyone?

Last night leaving work...

Crazy to watch...

I heard the fire alarm going off when I first showed up at work, but didn't call, figuring that the fire-department were already aware.  Leaving work two hours later, I noticed that the fire alarm was still going strong, and one door on the side of the building had water gushing from both the top and bottom.  Unfortunately, the door was on an unlit side of the building behind a fence, so I couldn't get a good picture.

As it turned out, something had set-off the sprinkler system inside the building, and one small room had become so flooded through the course of the night that it was nearly full-to-the-top.

The building used to be occupied by local TV station WB-56... so clearly it's been vacant for some time now.  But I've heard that a very well-known auto-salesman is planning on moving in.  Good thing he has some money to cover the flood-damage.

Too Old-School for Twitter

All I wanted to do was make this my Twitter Photo...

...but Twitter wouldn't let me.  Old timers like us can never catch a break in the industrial-age, aren't I right, Aristocat?

A noisy day in the neighborhood

I've finally figured out how to get revenge on my neighbors who always feel as though my naptime is a wonderful time to rearrange furniture above my bedroom.

Now I just need to figure out their bed-time and END IT.

Permanent Scars

Today I watched a stranger stab my girlfriend repeatedly for four hours straight, leaving her a sore, bloody mess...

Lucky for us, that stranger is the very talented Amanda Abbott of Empire Tattoo in Somerville.  The battle-scars form a beautiful "Victorian cameo" (simply put, a lady-face from the side.  It's okay, I wouldn't have known either).  I'll refrain from posting a picture of the ink until it's finished... Needless to say, four hours of pain was as much as my girlfriend could handle... which still beats my record of about 20 minutes.  Please don't take that out of context.

But I will say this:  Having spent a good amount of time in tattoo parlors throughout my early 20's, I do give high-marks both to Amanda's work and to Empire Tattoo as a whole.  The experience was made especially great for me being able to watch The Goonies in the waiting room (cheers to my fellow children of the 80's/90's):

Humiliating

So I recently found this old mix-CD I made myself during what must have been a particularly rough period of High School...

*cringe*

Remember having different mix CD's for each of your many mood-swings?  I know I'm not alone in this... There was a period of time from 2000-2005 where every friend's car I got in had stacks of burned CD-R's, with labels like "SUMMER MIX" or "WORKOUT SONGS" or "PEOPLE SUCK".  Clearly my approach to girl-problems at the time was to counter my little first-world depression with happy music.

And since I know you're wondering... yes, I did listen to it.  And it rules.

#Instagram

This was posted last night on Reddit, and I think it deserves a discussion:

I was at McDonalds and this kid dropped his chocolate milk, began to cry, and his dad got up, said “this some instagram shit” and started taking pictures.

Let's be real:  Instagram is just LOADED with selfies, cats, and dinner pics... Every time something happens in your life that transcends the mundane, you feel compelled to document it for the world to see, with as many hashtags as possible.  I know, I'm the same way, it's those bizarre personal moments that make Instagram so great.  THE PROBLEM:  Now whenever we see a potentially troubling situation (i.e., a car crash, a street fight, or, ya know... a kid throwing a fit in McDonalds), our first instinct isn't to do something about it, but to throw the X-Pro filter on it and get as many <3's as possible. It's kind of crazy.

That said, I'd have <3'd that picture.

Breakfast Innovation

Just had this conversation with a 60+ year old coworker of mine..

Me:  "You should try dipping your banana in your hot chocolate, it's delicious"
Him:  "I'm just not as kinky as you are."

Well played.   But it's true.  Not the kinky part (actually... maybe the kinky part), but bananas dipped in hot chocolate?  Amazing.  The dual-result:  Chocolate-flavored bananas, and banana-flavored hot chocolate. 

I'm looking at you, Dunkin Donuts.  Get on it.

Speaking of bananas, if you get a second, read the reviews for this banana-slicer on Amazon.  Trust me.

Haters Gonna Hang-up

While uploading the video from Charlotte earlier today, I was reminded that I do, in fact, have a YouTube channel.  Here is the first video I uploaded a couple of months ago, after a year of hate-mail from my previous radio job...

Description:
Over the course of the last year, Daniel has called me an "arrogant", "pathetic" "asshole", "prick", "loser", "hippie", a "mindf*ck of stupidity", and he's even requested that I kill myself!  I figured today should be the day I make friends with Daniel.  We had a very productive conversation.

Space Swag

via BuzzFeed

Think he has an extra seat?  I'll gladly pay for gas and split driving/flying duties.

Reminds me of this guy I saw in Charlotte this summer...

mamase mamasa mama-HairCut

via Tosh.0

Quite frankly, I'm more interested in seeing how this haircut looks in two days, once Michael starts to get a bit stubbly.  Bearded Michael?  Scarier than the "Thriller" video.

Big Apple, Big Ego

A thought just crossed my mind while spinning this morning on Hot 96.9...

Has anyone ever called out Jay-Z for naming the song "Empire STATE of Mind", but only rapping about one city?  It's not even the capital of New York.  That would be like writing a song about Massachusetts but only rapping about Worcester.  I just tried to come up with lyrics about Worcester, but only got this far:

"Yeah, now I'm at the Palladium"

 Actually, this guy does a pretty good job:  Commonwealth State of Mind

Also, can we agree to stop playing "Empire State of Mind" before Boston Sporting Events?  I heard it playing at Gillette Stadium (through the TV) the other day and almost had to drive to Foxboro just to sit and have a passive-aggressive history lesson with their music coordinator.

And finally, can S'more-flavored PopTarts stop being so delicious?  400 calories-per-bag, 400% more diabeetus.

"Sup B?" "LOL nm, jus gettin inaugurated"

I'm glad I wasn't the only one who noticed this during today's inauguration:

via Reddit

But let's be real... do you think there was a single person in Washington who DIDN'T look at their smartphone at some point during the festivities?  I can barely make the walk from my desk to the bathroom without checking Facebook on my phone, let alone sitting through a day-long parade.  

I can only hope that SOMEONE was sitting behind them and caught a glance at which apps they were using, because I'd LOVE to send good ol' Barry a game-request in Scramble With Friends.

In the beginning...

It's been a LONG time coming, so here we go... I finally feel compelled to express myself in more than 140 characters.

So if you're just tuning in, allow me to introduce myself:

Hi!  My name is Matt Shearer.  I'm soon-to-be 26 years old, living in Boston, and spinning throwback tunes on the all-new Hot 96.9 (WTKK-FM).  Here's my cheap attempt to build cred by posting pictures of myself with celebrities:

Gordon Ramsay hated every second of taking this photo:

Janeane Garofalo didn't get my "Wet Hot American Summer" joke:

Elizabeth Warren needed this photo to win the hearts of MA voters:

Whatever, he's a celebrity:

Marky Ramone MIGHT have given me food-poisoning.  Delicious sauce, though:

Metric for some hipster cred:

3x Superbowl Champ Joe Andruzzi put a ring on my finger:

Governor Deval Patrick had me over to his house once.  My hair was better that day:

No, I didn't greet him with "Hello, Newman":

Tony Shalhoub was Obama-fied:

I don't know what SNL did to Victoria Jackson but she may have officially lost her mind:

Try not to inhale near Cheech & Chong.  Seriously:

John King probably doesn't tell his bosses at CNN that he's from Dorchester:

Jon Lovitz was not a big fan of the internet, so I know he'll never see this:

Jason & Grant from "Ghost Hunters" used to be in radio, too:

Harland Williams should be in the Dumb & Dumber sequel:

Kids in the Hall... literally:

And last but certainly not least, SPIKE (the face of Spike's Junkyard Dogs):

That's enough for now.  I'll probably find more floating around my computer in forgotten folders, which will be added later.  For the most part, I plan to use this blog as a place to share my work with you, as well as the many thoughts that cross my mind.

Meanwhile:

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High-five me in person.